Astrology Humor – Light and Dark Side of the Zodiac
June 23, 2019
Each sign of the Zodiac emits a particular type of energy signature, shaped by its element, modality, and point of rulership. The four elements – Air, Earth, Fire, and Water – apply to three signs each: Libra/Aquarius/Gemini, Capricorn/Taurus/Virgo, Aries/Leo/Sagittarius, and Cancer/Scorpio/Pisces (respectively). There are three modalities – Cardinal, Fixed, and Mutable – that apply to four signs each: Aries/Cancer/Libra/Capricorn, Taurus/Leo/Scorpio/Aquarius, and Gemini/Virgo/Sagittarius/Pisces (respectively). Aries is ruled by Mars, Taurus by Venus, and so on.
Air is thought; Earth is the physical; Fire is spiritual, and Water is the emotions. Cardinal energy initiates and leads; Fixed energy stabilizes and orders; Mutable energy adapts and serves. Points express the “ideal” of the energy. Combine the element, modality, and point of rulership and you get a unique signature for each sign that helps us understand the nature and “application” of that sign out in the world. This article will look at some humorous ways to understand the signs, both in terms of their positive and negative expressions.
Humor and Astrology
Astrology is a complex tool and a wonderful subject for serious study; I work with it professionally and constantly encourage people and readers of my articles to get their full chart cast by a professional astrologer using professional astrology software. To get your full chart cast, you need to know your birth date, birth location, and birth time. All three are essential for casting an accurate chart. This complex understanding and use of astrology is not as well-known as the daily horoscope, which makes pronouncements about the Sun signs.
Next after this publicity
Because astrology is so widely known through Sun signs, a lot of humor about the signs constantly shows up on websites, printed cards, t-shirts, and so on. As someone who works with astrology constantly, I can often find the humor quite insightful and fun to “play around” with. This article contains some of my attempts at humorous reductions of the signs of the Zodiac to convey some of the archetypical meaning in a playful way through quotes you could put on a t-shirt to give as a gift to a friend, co-worker, or family member.
Aries
Aries is the Cardinal Fire sign of the Zodiac, which means it “initiates spiritually”. The sign of “I act”.
Quote for the Light Side of Aries
“I act, let me help!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Aries
“I act, get the hell out of my way!”
Taurus
Taurus is the Fixed Earth sign of the Zodiac, which means it “stabilizes and secures”. The sign of “I need”.
Quote for the Light Side of Taurus
“I persist, you can count on me!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Taurus
“I persist and won’t ever change for you.”
Gemini
Gemini is the Mutable Air sign of the Zodiac, which means it “communicates and learns”. The sign of “I seek”.
Quote for the Light Side of Gemini
“I love to learn, let me share what I know!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Gemini
“I love to learn; stick, ball, squirrel!!”
Cancer
Cancer is the Cardinal Water sign of the Zodiac, which means it “nurtures and protects”. The sign of “I care”.
Quote for the Light Side of Cancer
“I nurture, let me take care of you!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Cancer
“I nurture, let me sMother you!”
Leo
Leo is the Fixed Fire sign of the Zodiac, which means it “leads and plays”. The sign of “I stand out”.
Quote for the Light Side of Leo
“I shine, let me entertain you!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Leo
“I shine; love me or I will hate you!”
Virgo
Virgo is the Mutable Earth sign of the Zodiac, which means it “serves and solves”. The sign of “I help”.
Quote for the Light Side of Virgo
“I perfect; what can I do to help you!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Virgo
“I perfect, let me point out all your faults!”
Libra
Libra is the Cardinal Air sign of the Zodiac, which means it “relates and analyzes”. The sign of “I connect”.
Quote for the Light Side of Libra
“I relate; what can we do together?!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Libra
“I relate; I will never leave you alone!”
Scorpio
Scorpio is the Fixed Water sign of the Zodiac, which means it “transforms and penetrates”. The sign of “I change”.
Quote for the Light Side of Scorpio
“I regenerate; I will protect you!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Scorpio
“I regenerate, I am here to torture you!”
Sagittarius
Sagittarius is the Mutable Fire sign of the Zodiac, which means it “expands and proselytizes”. The sign of “I know”.
Quote for the Light Side of Sagittarius
“I expand, let me show you the world!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Sagittarius
“I expand; get out of my way!”
Capricorn
Capricorn is the Cardinal Earth sign of the Zodiac, which means it “achieves and excels”. The sign of “I succeed”.
Quote for the Light Side of Capricorn
“I succeed; let me share with you!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Capricorn
“I succeed; you are a speed bump on my drive to achieve!”
Aquarius
Aquarius is the Fixed Air sign of the Zodiac, which means it “revolutionizes and awakens”. The sign of “I idealize”.
Quote for the Light Side of Aquarius
“I idealize; let’s be authentic together!”
Quote for the Dark Side of Aquarius
“I idealize; who you calling weird, weirdo!”
Pisces
Pisces is the Mutable Water sign of the Zodiac, which means it “spiritualizes and cleanses”. The sign of “I imagine”.
I am a spiritual adviser based in Cumming, Georgia, serving clients both locally and worldwide. With a background in academics and a Ph.D. in English from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro, I bring a unique blend of knowledge and intuition to my practice. After a fulfilling career in academia, I transitioned into the role of a stay-at-home father in 2007. In 2013, I established Black Unykorn Enterprises, LLC, offering spiritual guidance and support to individuals seeking insight and clarity on their life's journey. My services encompass various tools, including astrology, tarot/oracle cards, numerology, and past life regression utilizing muscle testing. I am dedicated to providing personalized sessions that empower and guide my clients towards their highest potential.
Conveniently equipped with a home office and utilizing platforms like Zoom and WhatsApp, I offer virtual sessions for local clients and for those around the world. Distance is not a barrier to the transformative experiences and guidance I provide. To learn more about my practice and explore how I can assist you on your spiritual path, I invite you to visit my website at https://www.blackunykorn.com. There, you will find detailed information about my services and a contact form to initiate a conversation.
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